Kyther: Reluctantly solicit Videne.

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Rakiah finds it prudent to have a highly low-key presence on the Alternet. While it’s quite normal for many trolls to have hideways of anonymity, not having a single public-facing social media account is pretty unusual. After all, a troll’s HIERARCHY OF NEEDS tends to place LOVE AND BELONGING directly above BASIC PHYSIOLOGICAL REQUIREMENTS.

So, for a single moment, you contemplate… what exactly is Rakiah hiding from?

Unfortunately, this deep, insightful ponderation is quickly cut short by a VISCERAL WAVE OF REGRET as that insufferable fountain of memes lunges at the single CRUMB OF ATTENTION that you gave her. Ugh.
Well, time to get it over with.

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  • velvetDownpour: 0x{whats up bulgepan} 0x{you want some more eye drones, huh????} 0x{i know you liked my last ones} 0x{||} 0x{liked blowing them up rather} 0x{fucking money sink} 0x{if you keep that shit up i’== gonna have to run 4 more channels just to fund your target practice} 0x{like come on cool it on the wanton destruction 0F my shit} 0x{you’== practically pitchflirting with my credwallet here}
  • amateurArsonist: []h my shit d[] y[]u ever l[]g []ff
  • velvetDownpour: 0x{draining it for all it’s got like you’== a pail-for-hire trying to afford a down payment on a scuttlebuggy} 0x{milk that fiscal bulge like it’== the fifth era recession && 5EHIC just told the core worlds to eat cake}
  • amateurArsonist: wheat the fuck aer y[]u even talking a[]but
  • velvetDownpour: 0x{i pop open my dex && retrieve my card && swipe it at the store && a wingbug just flies out 0F the card reader} 0x{“”sorry you’re broke!!!! a dumb fucking nerd blew up too many 0F your drones && now you’== going to die because you can’t afford your cartful 0F overpriced wondergrub from the wondergrub aisle””} 0x{not that i need to go to the store really i got better shit to do} 0x{long story short if you want more drones to blow up you’== gonna have to wait} 0x{i’!= made 0F caegars douchebag}
  • amateurArsonist: did y[]u re ally presend msesages lma[] if i didndt think y[]u were just a maasive t[][]l id say y[]uw ere c[]ming []n a little desrpeately pitch
  • velvetDownpour: 0x{that was all 0Ff the dome} 0x{on the spot} 0x{i type fast you know that} 0x{ask ya palerail} 0x{also: sounds like you’== reading too far into things} 0x{sounds like you’== the desperate one} 0x{but unfortch i don’t feel the same} 0x{my distaste for you == purely platonic-to-conciliatory}
  • amateurArsonist: whatever just shut up shut the fukc up listent t[] me f[]r []ne sec i nede uhg ......ineedafav[]r
  • velvetDownpour: 0x{wow} 0x{what kind 0F juicy info could you possibly be coming to me for} 0x{you must be} 0x{absolutely deeeesperate} 0x{well} 0x{whatever it ==} 0x{it’== gonna cost ya} 0x{>::]}
  • amateurArsonist: its i need a picture[]f y[]u kn[]w id []nteven kn[]w whyive nevre asked f[]r tihs bef[]re but shutthef uckpu and send it
  • velvetDownpour: 0x{LMAOOOO} 0x{LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO} 0x{okay i see you} 0x{i am fucking SEEING you right now you == TRANSPARENT} 0x{lusting after jade ass like you lust after the pitch recipr0Cations 0F your perpetually broken window} 0x{this == like} 0x{a shitty dumb romcom for idiot wigglers who dump fat waste pellets in their sanitary incontinence cloths}
  • amateurArsonist: []h i jsut reemmebered why i d[]nt ask f[]r anyhingfr[]m y[]u
  • velvetDownpour: 0x{""guhhhh == this flushcrush gonna evolve into something more????} 0x{|| == i gonna sit on my useless ass && cry while bruising my own bulge to alternian blitzball for 10 hours???? who knows""} 0x{some real scotte pilgim bullshit you == on} 0x{whatever i == done dunking on you i’== got way more important trolls to mess with} 0x{++ you != one 0F them} 0x{there i’ve eye-picked an absolutely succulent shot from my folder this == really gonna cost you kyther} 0x{the cost 0F bulgef0Dder that somehow manages to == perfectly safe for work == skyr0Cketing} 0x{like the economy under grand econolarcener 0Bamaa davkat} 0x{now} 0x{you would == surprised at how a troll big enough to make a drone sweat can == so hard to track down} 0x{i on the other hand wouldn’t == surprised because unlike you i am a G0D at this shit} 0x{turns out this bitch kicks over her online trails with the speed 0F a barkbeast that just slurped up a wipe’s supply 0F quil} 0x{the amount 0F photos she has up == NULL} 0x{she has ZERO fucking clout!!!!} 0x{so cloutph0Bic she won the prize for “least popular jade on this entire garbageplanet”} 0x{&& managing to == a likable jade is != a hard bar to clear!!!!} 0x{well actually that == both true && not true at the same time} 0x{she’s got a TINY bit 0F clout} 0x{but it’== all uselessly split between a bunch 0F dumb ass anonymous accounts for weird shit like} 0x{her serious passion about supernatural shapeshifting creatures that she actually d0Es != want to talk about at all????} 0x{which she has bad taste in by the way}
  • amateurArsonist: videne
  • velvetDownpour: 0x{&& me tracking her accounts down was something she CLEARLY should have foreseen if she had even half her pan left} 0x{also she likes posting theories about ARGs and shit} 0x{doing some stupid ass wiggler level puzzles like “”oh w0Ah == that really a caegarean cipher hidden in the wack ass l0Fi beat that the funny talking lusus account dropped????”” 0x{it’== like she actually LOVES getting roped around like a fool} 0x{she == so easy to screw with you have NOOOO idea} 0x{but the weird thing == that sometimes people LIKE her incomprehensible esoteric theories} 0x{only when they can manage to tolerate her incredibly inane way 0F speaking though} 0x{cause WOW this bitch can != form a simple coherent sentence that gets to the point fast enough!!!!}
  • amateurArsonist: viden e do y[]u think yu[] c[]uld maybe like n[]t put y[]ur gr[]ss little claws all []ver every[]nesprivate stuff s[]metiem
  • velvetDownpour: 0x{oh hmmmm let me think about that} 0x{woooow kyther that really == a great idea here let me just go && delete my boundless banks 0F information including this picture you asked for}
  • amateurArsonist: []h fuck []ff
  • velvetDownpour: 0x{awwww well since you absolutely insist} 0x{i might just have to keep being my widely adored self then!!!!} 0x{&& also kyther go die in a fire my claws are absolutely immaculate} 0x{anyway i == going to make you an extra special deal because you == a valued high quality cringe reservoir} 0x{you’== get this juicy perfectly safe for work photo for the low low low low price 0F} 0x{owing me a favor.} 0x{so hey} 0x{thank me for being such a go0D generous friend} 0x{>;;]} 0x{no????} 0x{well damn} 0x{not even a sick ass epic quote that you grabbed 0Ff a game’s tvdopes page????} 0x{kyther this cold shoulder you == giving me right now == rivaling an entire ass aphelions worth 0F icegnaw} 0x{&& i mean real cold like “”cringe ass wiggler that just had an epic fail death on the eve 0F their first sweep”” icy shit} 0x{ugh come onnnn kyther} 0x{== you really gonna just....} 0x{curl up in a funny little ball and let ME have the last word like that?}
  • amateurArsonist: its abs[]lutely incredible and exhuasting h[]w y[]u have the pwoer t[]type at lkie 400 quadrllion w[]rdspmr minute while n[]ne []f it means aynthign at al l becasue y[]ur thinkpan adn waste chute swithced places whtaever fuck it i []we y[]u []k i d[]nt even care if its sm[]e kind []f weird ass meme pciture []r s[]methgn h[]rny just give me her
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At last, you receive AN ATTACHED IMAGE FILE.

Wow. It feels like you’ve aged 50 fucking sweeps.

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